Newsletter

More than two weeks in, and we are really feeling it… You spend most days thinking about the physical health of your children and loved ones, and Tribeca Pediatrics is here to help you support their mental health, too.

Anxiety manifests differently for each child and each age group. As a parent, it is not your job to shield your children from anxiety and change, but to teach them effective strategies to manage it. As most of us know from experience, life rarely gets less challenging as we grow older. You should help guide your children through their early challenges, so that they are equipped to tackle more later in life. One theory of psychosocial development, named Erikson’s stages, helps provide a framework for considering your child’s anxiety.

2-8 Years Old
Throughout this stage, children’s main psychosocial relationships are with parents and family. This is a great time to embrace social distancing and come together for quality family time. That said, it is normal to feel a strain on the parent-child relationship after just a few days of WFH.

Here are some tips:
• Outline your workspace clearly. Set and enforce the boundaries you need as a working parent. (Just because everyone is dealing with changes, it does not mean regular discipline goes out the window.)

• Outline your home space clearly, so that when you’re finished with work you can be present with your children. (Ask them what they did today, what they learned. Don’t assume you know because you were home.)

Anxiety at this age can manifest as increased tantrums, new onset sleep problems, and somatic symptoms (headaches and stomachaches).

Some tools to help with anxiety include:
• Have your child name the feeling and explain it in a simple way. (For example, “I feel… scared/mad/lonely, because… of the virus/I want to go to the playground/I miss my friends.”)

• Reassure your child that you are working together as a family to keep each other safe, while acknowledging that it is normal to feel these emotions.

• Keep routines the same (meals, bedtime, etc.)

9-12 Years Old
For pre-teens, significant relationships are built through school and community. Your children have started to form more complex friendships and peer relationships outside of the family, and this has been suddenly torn away from them. Also, just as suddenly, the early stages of puberty have come to your home to roost, 24/7. As a parent, you may feel the loss of your sweet, loving youngster more intensely because of the close proximity.

How you can manage it:
• Embrace the chaos and importance of this developmental stage. You will remain the dependable foundation, but allow your children the distance they crave. (Let your daughter storm off to her room without reprimanding her for it.)

• Use this as an opportunity to guide them through their own understanding of right and wrong, developing goals and accomplishing what’s important to them. (Is there a project your family can help to support those without resources in your community?)

Anxiety at this age is similar to its presentation in adults, including excessive worry over daily tasks, sudden crying, and disturbed sleep patterns.

Strategies to help:
• Talk openly with your child about his or her reactions to the outbreak, and share some of your fears and reactions, too. (You may be pleasantly surprised by the wisdom you can receive from a 10 year old!)

• Discuss strategies to help reframe anxieties. If your child feels out of control, ask him to list some things he can control, like breathing or his own muscles. (Practice a deep breathing exercise or progressive muscle relaxation.)

13-18 Years Old
The significant psychosocial relationship for teenagers is with peers and role models. They are watching their friends and other members of their generation respond to this crisis through social media, while trying to determine what their own role is. Keep in mind that just like you, your adolescent has already experienced burnout from all the posts, texts, and news hurled at him or her from that 5.8 inch screen.

How to make the experience valuable:
• Ask teens about their views on the city’s, country’s, and world’s response. What do their friends think? (Notice which characteristics shine through when you hear their concerns – empathy, fairness, passion, strength? Reflect this back.)

It is estimated that one in three adolescents meet criteria for an anxiety disorder, and that was before the COVID-19 outbreak happened.

Some ways to help:
• Share your own strategies for managing the changes and anxiety. (Guided meditation, journaling, exercise, screaming into a pillow – these are all healthy ways to cope.)

• Reassure your teenager that we will get through this. Our world will be changed, but we will not be social distancing forever. (Children and teenagers are amazingly resilient; let your child teach you some resiliency.)

If you are concerned about your child’s anxiety throughout this time, please call us. Our nurses and providers are here to help. Below are a few resources to check out if you need a place to start.

Resources:
1. YouTube – Yoga with Adriene
2. Instagram – newlovecity_
3. Ashley Neese – Free Breathwork Support Group
4. Amber Rae – 30-Day Guided Journaling Journey